While working as a caregiver, I've had many opportunities to view what it is like to age. I know better what I want to be like when I grow up.
I have struggled working with one elderly lady. Not because of the cares I do for her, but because of her attitude. She always has something to complain about, never is better than "fine", and has no drive to progress forward. She is only 65. Every effort I make to help her improve is seen as punishment (even torture)- physical therapy exercises, getting a bed bath, going to the doctor. I can't understand how she gets up and sits in her chair resting all day until it is time for a meal and then goes back to resting. She is still capable of a lot but does not put any effort into it. I love this lady, but want so bad for her to change her attitude. I have hope that things can improve for her while she has none.
In comparison, I cared for another lady who was 90 and passed away less than a week after I was with her. She was confined to her bed, ate no more than two bites of yogurt a day (which I doubt she swallowed), and her body was shutting down. Through it all, this sweet lady literally smiled all day. She always said thank you when she was oriented enough to. She would say "woaahhh" as though riding a roller coaster when her bed was moved up and down to make others laugh. She had a positive attitude and smiled to the end.
One couple was a treat. At 85 they had a list of things they wanted to do during the day. Some days it was take pictures of and categorize the hummingbirds that come to the back porch. Others it was drive 1.5 hours to an Indian casino so the husband could play blackjack. (He said I was his "lucky charm" and I proved to be.) His wife was happy to nap in the minivan while he won/lost some money. They spent other time just wanting to be taken down roads they have not traveled on before, sharing their life stories, and passing on advice. They are living life to the fullest and doing things that make them happy.
I think everyone has trials and problems, it just comes down to how you deal with them. Attitude makes all the difference.
I have struggled working with one elderly lady. Not because of the cares I do for her, but because of her attitude. She always has something to complain about, never is better than "fine", and has no drive to progress forward. She is only 65. Every effort I make to help her improve is seen as punishment (even torture)- physical therapy exercises, getting a bed bath, going to the doctor. I can't understand how she gets up and sits in her chair resting all day until it is time for a meal and then goes back to resting. She is still capable of a lot but does not put any effort into it. I love this lady, but want so bad for her to change her attitude. I have hope that things can improve for her while she has none.
In comparison, I cared for another lady who was 90 and passed away less than a week after I was with her. She was confined to her bed, ate no more than two bites of yogurt a day (which I doubt she swallowed), and her body was shutting down. Through it all, this sweet lady literally smiled all day. She always said thank you when she was oriented enough to. She would say "woaahhh" as though riding a roller coaster when her bed was moved up and down to make others laugh. She had a positive attitude and smiled to the end.
One couple was a treat. At 85 they had a list of things they wanted to do during the day. Some days it was take pictures of and categorize the hummingbirds that come to the back porch. Others it was drive 1.5 hours to an Indian casino so the husband could play blackjack. (He said I was his "lucky charm" and I proved to be.) His wife was happy to nap in the minivan while he won/lost some money. They spent other time just wanting to be taken down roads they have not traveled on before, sharing their life stories, and passing on advice. They are living life to the fullest and doing things that make them happy.
I think everyone has trials and problems, it just comes down to how you deal with them. Attitude makes all the difference.
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